The return of the pain patch saga and more in the saga of an 11 year old pre teen!!!

FM
I was hoping this blog would be a mainly knitting, non moaning blog. But a certain little unwelcome visitor rules my life so I'm going to moan away.
Last week was the pits! Un known to me until Monday, I had a bug and temperature. How would I not know? Well I feel like I've got the flu most of the time. I ache esp my legs and my skin is sore to touch. Some days its so 'alive' I cant bear wearing clothes next to my legs. I've had to stop wearing jeans as they're to heavy for my legs and wear soft trackies or a skirt.
Anyway, back to the bug. Sunday my legs felt like my bones were broken. Smashed into smithereens. Nothing unusual there. it also hurt to swallow. nothing unusual there. my throat flares up constantly. I was really tired. Nowt new there either! Mon I went to swimming but came home and went to bed. In bed I was sweating. Nowt new there either! I often have periods of sweating. its the SSRI's I beleive. Any way, just out of curiosity I took my temp and low and behold it was 38C. I slept then for the whole of monday afternoon, evening and night!
So I was housebound for the rest of the week. I'd decided to go swimming Friday, but my cleaner let me down so I had to do a bit of cleaning in between rests. I recon I could probably manage the house if I did one room a day, but I prefer the cleaner and save my energies for other things. So by Saturday I was climbing the walls. Rachel asked me to go to town with her as she wanted to go to Primark. Primark on a Saturday! OMG!! You need to steal yourself to go there esp on an electric scooter! Anyway I'd said yes on Friday, but when Saturday came I was so stiff and sore from over doing it on the cleaning front Friday that I stayed in. actually I had rather a nice afternoon. Josh was over the road at his friends so I put my U2 Vertigo Tour DVD on a sat knitting, singing along!wishing I'd been able to go to the concert in '05 Grrrr-bleeding illness. Whenever the next U2 tour is I shall be there! even if I'm strapped in a bed!!!
and now to this week. More moaning I'm afraid. I went to the GP's Monday coz I've run out of tramadol. I told him about the pain pathces. 5mg not enough-10mg too strong. Should I remain on tramadol until I go back to the pain clinic in march? he asked me to try the 5mg patch again for a whole month as see what developed. so here I am 48 hrs later with no pain cover again going mad as they take 3-5 days to absorrb into your body. I was so uncomfortable in the night thatI didnt go to sleep until 5am! Then I was up at 7am and finally fell asleep at 9.30 am until 12.45pm! I was woken by my neighbours frantically ringing the bell to see if I was OK. The curtains were shut downstairs and they were worried about meWhich is very nice, but I feel like some old dear.
I'm feeling very down again about the whole FM thing. how boring is my life? I rely on Norman for everything. I need xyz, I have to wait until weekend when he can take me. I'm so pissed off with it all. I want my life back but its not going to happen.
And to cheer me up even furhter today, my throat is bad and I've a mild temp again. I suspect this temp of mine is going up more than I've realised.

Family
And to cheer me up even more, last weeks crap news was that my Mum needs another lot of Chemo. This is the third lot she's had now. I'm more upset now than in the past I think coz as it gets further down the line you wonder how much she can take before it totally overhwelms her. Also wwith Josh's barmitzvah a year in April, I want her there. In fact last night I tried listening to my weight loss CD as it usually relaxes me and I go to sleep. But one of the images is seeing yourself in the future, slim , with a new outfit on. My Image is of me infront of the mirror on the morning of Josh's barmitzvah looking slim in my posh suit. But last night, or 3o'clock this morning I couldnt cunjour the image up. I kept thinking of Mum and the uncertain future and it got me upset so I abandoned the tape. But she's held the C off before now twice so lets just hope. its been 4 years now that she's been battling and I just get this sense that time, god forbid , is running out. I hope not.

other than that rachels' had some of her mock results and was in a foul temper last night as they're 'not good enough'. She has mostly A's but a few B's. Fine by me. I said to her she's worked really hard and done her best and the results were fine. I think she was hoping for a string of A* but its not the real thing till May. Sam got 11 GCSE's 4A* and 4A's so she pitting herself against him. Actually overall, in her school work Rachel has always been brighter than Sam so I dont think she should worry.

Josh-Oh Boy!! that kid is like Bart Simpson and just lurches from one disaster to another. he came home Monday after school and asked me had Mrs so and so rang? No she hadnt. well?.... I'm waiting, what have you done now? Turns out he'd punched a girl friend in the stomach, he thought playfully, but it was really hard. The girl had to see the school nurse! Josh was to stay in 'exclusion' all yesterday and have an afterschool detention aswell as punishment. He , according to him, didnt do anything. But then he never does. The world collapses around him and he's done nothing.
He came home yesterday and said exclusion was fine! he'd sat in a classroom all day with some other naughty kids, read a bit, done some homework and played the system. With each teacher change into the classroom he'd asked to go to the toilet. some times he's needed it and sometimes he's wandered around the school for 10 mins and wandered back! He didnt have an after school either. some punishment!! Its like water off a ducks back to him. whatever we or school do, its like'wha'ever' in that Katherine tate voice! grrrr!He was so rude to me and Hubby at dinner time last night that I told him he couldnt go across the road to his friends. He was answering us back and giving us hell, so I turned round and said' dont you dare speak to me and your father in that disrespectful manner. We didnt put you in exclusion all day . YOU did that by your own actions. So speak politely to us or not at all.' That shut him up!!!
He was nice as pie after that. Hubby took grumpy Rachel to a sixth form open evening at school and I sat with him. warned him I was in pain and tired so to behave. he had a bath at 8pm and was in bed for 9pm which is what he needed. I made a fuss of him so he was mollified. He's exhausting that child!!

Knitting
well considering this was to be primarily a knitting blog until some little sod of an illness rept in a stole the shwo!, there isnt alot to tell. I'm plodding on with the Stepping Stones jacker. I've done one front triangle row and am filling in the side triangles which is laborious. To be honest I am now bored. I've finished the back and the front is a replica and I'm finding it tedious. But I'm determined this time to finish one project at a time and not have 5-6 on the go! But I can feel another sock beconing me! Dont give in.

Weight loss
yay another 1lb off this week!! I'm so happy.