I had them all in tears!!!

Havnt blogged for a few weeks as last weekend was Josh's barmitzvah and the run up was a bit hectic. The whole weekend has been amazing!
josh read his portion from the Torah. it was a long one this week. he did fantastically I was so proud. His dad, grandpa and close relatives all made blessings before the Torah readings so the whole, male , family got involved. Its so wonderful to see these events. Mr Cinders Dad made it to the Synagogue so we were delighted as he's nearly 86 and very frail and it was touch and go all week as to whether he's make it or not. after all her chemo my Mum looked fantastic so all round it was a weekend of delight.
After the service we had a small buffet of cakes, crisps, fishballs etc. This is called a Kiddush and we have a small version every week after a service, but ours was the Rolls Royce version!!
Then the immediate family came back to our house for lunch. by 4pm I was bog eyed so I fell into bed and slept and stayed in bed for the whole of the rest of the day!
Sunday started early with us having our hair done, then we held afternoon tea in the adjoining Synagogue hall for 80 family and friends.
it was wonderful. Our colour scheme was bright royal blue and metalic silver, as chosen by Josh. So the invites were in those colours, the hall was decked out in those coloured balloons and the men- Mr Cinders, Sam and Josh all had on variations of blue and silver shirts and ties.

We had tons to eat, sandwhiches, finger sized buns, saoury struddle and mimi quiches followed y yummy deserts.
norman, myself, and the kids all gave speeches. The kids were very funny. sam is a natural infront of a microphone. he should be with the Footlights!!
Josh had wanted me to make a speech. I think he thought I was going to say how cheeky he was etc. But I didnt,
This is my speech verbatim . It had people sniffing into their hankies!!

Rabbis, Family and friends,

When Josh asked me to make a speech at his barmitzvah. I don’t think he thought I’d be saying the following. I hope you all don’t think that what I’m going to say is inappropriate for today.

As you all know the last 5 years in the Fryman household have not been easy, to say the least since I developed Fibromyalgia. Whilst it has been hard enough for me personally to cope with going from being a perfectly normally functioning human being , taking for granted the things we do daily, the boring stuff, washing, cleaning, shopping etc, to driving, and the fun stuff, taking the kids out , having family days out etc, to becoming semi-disabled ,and being in pain and exhausted 24/7, it has had a knock on affect on my direct family and those close to me. It is with this in mind that I wanted to say a few thank-yous.

Firstly thank you to all my wider family friends and neighbours ,which includes everyone sat here today, for phoning and enquiring about me. So many of you have helped and supported me, Thanks to my neighbour ann who regularly takes me out and has even pushed me in my wheelchair, which believe you me, since I’m no longer sylph like, is no mean feet!!

To my life long friends Mandy and Karen. Firstly thank you for today’s speech. I’m so glad you left out all my misdemeanours over the last 30 odd years!! Thank-you for phoning me weekly, , for allowing me to moan and cry, for the laughter and lunches. You truly are the greatest friends.

And now on to my family. My in-laws- Leila you make the best chopped and boiled fish this side of Manchester. Thank you for your support and for keeping us supplied with heimishe foods, picklemeat, chopped herring etc!!

My parents, Mum and dad, you have always been there to help and support me. Dad, when I was a small girl and subsequent teenager, you were my taxi service ferrying me and my friends here there and everywhere. When I grew up and started driving you were redundant for a few years. Then along came the grandchildren and you became gramps taxi. Now they have grown up and don’t need your services so much you thought you could have a breather. Oh No! I stopped driving 2 years ago and you became Dads taxi yet again! Long may you continue to be able to ferry me around!!
Mum, you have struggled with your illness and punishing treatments with an amazing inner strength, fortitude and courage. You’re an inspiration to all of us. It hurts me that I cannot physically help you as I’d like to do and I know equally, you feel the same about me, But we talk every day on the phone when we cant visit each other and support each other in this way. I wish you only good health and happiness in the future and thank you for being there for me always.

My children, Sam, I am so very proud of all that you have achieved in life so far. You’ve grown up into a handsome, intelligent young man I love your acerbic, sharp intellectual humour. You remind me of Steven Fry in that respect. You’ve always helped me at home even during studying for you g.c.s.e’s and A levels, you would always drop what you were doing and take on your role as heavy pan lifter, carrier of washing up and down stairs ,opener of difficult jars and bottles and repairer of my computer. Now you are at uni I miss your help and witticisms. Thank you for being a wonderful son and I wish you every success in your future. BTW when we get home can you have a look at my computer please? !!

Rachel, my wonderful daughter. You have grown into a beautiful, intelligent, kind and thoughtful human being. You’re the best daughter a mother could wish for. your incessant chatter makes me so happy. I love the house being full of all your friends and listening to your laughter. I love our trips out together. You have always seemed so mature and level headed and have approached the changes in the household in a very practical way. You’re a fantastic cook and luckily for me you’re on a health kick so we get some gorgeous, healthy meals at home. You’re not only my daughter but my friend .I count myself a lucky mum as not every one can say that. Thank you so much for all you help and support

And now the Barmitzvah boy, Josh!! I’m so very proud of you this weekend. As dad said, you read your maftir and haphtarah beautifully.
Dad has said much about your gorgeous looks and cheeky ways so I wont dwell on those. You can make me laugh so easily with your antics and chatter. We’ve always been very close, you and I. you were very young when I became ill and I know you found it very difficult and bewildering as the fibro is invisible. I look fine. There was no bandage or plaster cast for you to see and you couldn’t understand why a few months ago Mum was fine and now she was finding it hard to do stuff. Believe you me Josh, it was equally as hard on me having to say no I couldn’t come out and play football, I couldn’t take you to the park or the cinema etc. We’re still training you in the helping around the house department…The’ but I’m a teenager, I don’t set tables or empty dishwashers’ routine doesn’t wash any more!! But you’re getting more and more helpful as you grow up and mature. You are the best cup of tea maker. I love it when you bring me bedtime drinks and get in bed and cuddle up to me. I’ve always enjoyed my loves and cuddles and I hope you are never to old to come and hug your Mum.

And last but not least my wonderful husband of 21 1/2 years..Norman. You’ve always been there besides me no matter what I’ve thrown at you. These last 5 years have been incredibly difficult for you and you’re truly amazing. Not only have you had to cope with running a business single handed, but also taking over many household tasks and the child care as I’ve become less able to do these things. the shopping , a lot of housework, a lot of the cooking until Rachel stepped in to help and since I stopped driving, ferrying the children here there and everywhere. You’ve also had to become my carer and help me with tasks as though I was a 90 year old woman. Last year you wore yourself ragged trying to decorate and garden as well as everything else and could often on a Sunday be seen scurrying around the house with a paint brush in one hand, a lawn mower in the other and a sweeping brush up… oh , er,.. in your mouth!!!!

Norman not only are you the best husband a woman could wish for husband, and a wonderful father, you are also my best friend and soul mate.. I Love you xxxxxx