In january I was in a dyeing and pushing my business mood. The sales that month were good and I pushed myself to dye even more. What happened? Yup, I ended up in bed! yes this is going to be another fibro rant so switch off now!
I had my head full of great ideas. I would do craft fairs, I'd love a stall at Woolfest,I would love a stall at i-Knit etc. Someone contacted me regarding wholosale supplying. But after trying to increase my output and failing I've realised that I cant do any of that stuff because of the Fibro.
The exhaustion is unbeleivable at the mo. I was very down about it all a month ago, but I'm more comfortable with my limitations now. I know I'll never be more than a Little Etsy seller doing a hobby really. it still gets me when I read of fellow dyers opening shops, stalls etc. I still think I'd love to do that. I'd love to have more enregy to just do what I want with my life. I have to plan so much.
E.G this weekend...Yesterday I went hunting for a hat for Josh's Barmitzvah. I must have my head covered for the Synagogue. We went to a local village RAmsbottom to a hat hire shop, only said hat hire shop is no more..recession and all that!! so we came home and looked on-line and found another hat hire place at a farm near Blackburn. Mr Cinders didnt mind driving, so we went back up the motorway the way we had just come and found this hat hire shop. beautiful hats but not the right one for my outfit. There was one to buy. a 'snip' at £159 !!!! yeah, I'll have one in every colour! Needless to say the said hat is still in the hat shop.
we got home and I fell into bed at 5pm. I slept till 7.30pm then had some supper and went straight back to bed. I was supposed to be taking M-I-L to manchester today to help her choose her barmitzvah outfit. I had a terrible night and really felt to ill to go but didnt want to dissapoint her. In the end we didnt have time to get there on a Sunday before the shops shut which I'm glad of, but tommorrow I usually go swimming, but tommorrow night we're going to see a comedy thing for the BBC with Michael macyntire.
so I have a dilema, do I risk going swimming? I might not be well enough to go out tommorrow night. If I had have gone shopping today I'd have been in bed all of tommorrow and not made it out tommorrw night.
I'm so sick of having to alot activites and spread them out and postpone one in favour of the other just because of this Fibro.
Just typing this has worn me out so I'll have to go and rest on the bed and not promote ny business on Ravelry which is what I wanted to do. I have tones of dyeing to do.... aaaaaarghhh!!! My f'ing body drives me bonkers!!!
I could've taken the dyeing so much further but...... All my dreams and ambitions have been thwarted
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(((hugs)))
fibro does that and I still am not used to it...
but: try to see what you càn do, not what you can't do... I try the same, and sometimes it works to be more gentle to myself...
I wish I lived close to you, I;d come and help and watch your store grow and grow. They have to find better ways of managing the Fibro soon, too many are suffering. I hope you find the perfect hat too.
The right hat is out there somewhere. I'm sure you will find it soon.
Having bought some of your home dyed yarn I am very sorry your plans have been put on hold. Think of this as a hiccup, not a terminal condition.
Lots of hugs.
I've been right where you are now...and in awhile we will flip flop places. I'm so sorry you're feeling this way...and let me just confirm that fibro DOES indeed suck!!!!!
It's the perspective that we have that makes the difference. What sucks even more is that when the fibro strikes hard, like it is with you right now, our perspective goes down the toilet.
Remember it WILL get better. email me if you need to vent!
hobbz4@yahoo.com
Thanks for the moral support, Cinders. Not going to see U2 this year. Enjoy Sheffield - it will be fab. (I have my brother's 30th, MIL and FIL's 40th anniversary and my cousin's wedding).
I didn't know you felt so bad, I really feel for for you, i know what its like cos i was worn out yesterday and in bed with this osteo, things are bound to get better. I went on Rav to UK Sellers??? group I'm so in love with one of your skeins, you are so clever with colours. Our friend Chez has tried spinning and dyeing but she's very modest about her skills. I hope you feel well enough for your son's big day horrors wouldn't it be awful......... I hope you might get a craft stall just local say once a year like me, work all year then sell your yarns on the stall. iKnit is a good ambition to have I hope you acheive it, you will be up there with jeni and kerrie and Perlesence......... dreamss are like marshmallows gone so quick.
Hi sorry you're feeling rough now but it sounds like you had a great night out hobnobbing with the stars!
Hope you're feeling better soon. If you stop by my blog, I put you forward for an award :)
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